The perfect Villain, a little Asian man lurking in a dark alley ready to pounce at the first hint of armpit. I am walking by, happily swinging my purse when, wham! said man jumps out and grabs me. Oh no, is he going to steal my purse? Rape me? Nope, he lifts my arm and gets his freak on by taking a big whiff, then runs away laughing.
Kutcher or Ed McMahon poke their head out laughing. After a while, I guess I would just be on my way thinking where's Batman when you need him? Seriously this is a crime that only super hero's can handle appropriately.
I would probably laugh and shake my head at the weirdness of it all and also, be excited to go to work the next day, as this would be the greatest water cooler anecdote ever!
I am sure it would be a scary situation but only because I would of imagined the worst thing that could of happened. Would I go to the police? Sure, I would report it...not a 911 call for sure more of a relaxed hey, by the way, some dude grabbed me and smelled my armpit kind of call.
Does forcefully smelling pitts really warrant 14 years in prison though? That just seems excessive!
Apparently, Marvel bought the rights to this story and I am anxiously awaiting the release of Batman vs The Armpit Sniffer.
~I surrender to The Writing Womb~